Hello everybody, and welcome to Zoe's Comedy Night! At last it's here, yay :)
Before the awesome Zoe Porter begins the night, I'd like to tell you that I have designed a blog.
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Everyone, grab your seats, get a little drink from our canteen…And enjoy!
ZOE, TAKE IT AWAY!
The new comedy blog, that became a hit…
It's readers enjoy it…
And now here is, Zoe's Comedy Night..
HAY, HAY, HAY EVERYBODY!
IT’S ME ZOE!
If you don’t know me, my name is Zoe Porter and I am 11 years old. People think I’m just plain WEIRD but I know I am the most normal-est person in the WORLD!
First of all, I would like to start off with a thank you to everyone who has attended, and also thank you to the lovely Rukiya for inviting me to do this post and for making the Zoe poster along with the Zoe ticket!
Oh yeah! Remember how if you booked a ticket you get a SHOUTOUT by moi? A lot of you have booked tickets and I’m ready to shoutout each one!
Here we go!
A shoutout to Sofia Babiera!
A shoutout to Lexie!
A shoutout to Rose!
A shoutout to Dani!
A shoutout to Little Robin!
A shoutout to Kanra Khan!
A shoutout to Nabila!
A shoutout to Suzy!
A shoutout to Noor!
And finally, a shoutout to Hannah!
Wow so many people! To the people who haven’t booked and people who haven’t gotten a shoutout, DO NOT WORRY! You guys are still people with shoutouts to me! Don’t feel discouraged because of a silly little shoutout!
Okay with that over, lemme talk about my day before I got here. Man, it was totally INSANE!
So I woke up. My parents already knew about my Comedy Night so they specially made me a gourmet breakfast. However, I skipped that and ate a blended plastic fork. Not as great as napkins, but I wanted to give it a try. It was horrible! It tasted like…. PLASTIC! However, I skipped the breakfast anyway. Then I went to school. I had my trusty fish macaroni and cheese with me and I was going to eat it during lunch. Once again, everyone avoided me. I would go up to someone and they would scream, “HELP, STRANGER DANGER, STRANGER DANGER!”
I wasn’t offended by that so instead I offered some of my fish macaroni and cheese. Sadly, they screamed,
“HELP, FOOD POISONING, ZOE’S TRYING TO GIVE US FOOD POISONING!”
I calmly explained that I ate it almost everyday and nothing ever happened to me. Then it was time for class again. I got every answer wrong when my teacher called on me and I was proud. Everyone was actually LAUGHING at me! Finally! They like me now!
When school was over, I only had a little bit of time to get ready for tonight. I got a dress and some accessories. However, when I was getting my dress from my restroom, I slipped on a toothpaste cap and hit my head in the wall! Look at the massive bruise on my forehead! *shows bruise* That’s not it. I had my eyes closed and was rubbing my forehead when I slipped on a bar of soap and went flying into the bathtub. I hit my funny bone on that one. Man, that FEELING! Oh yeah and this all took place in the restroom. I have officially started hating my restroom now. THE PAIN. I finally got out of my restroom and got dressed. Choosing the outfit was hard. I went to a clothing store in a mall and spent LOTS of time there. I went there at 12:00PM and came back home at like 6:00PM! Fortunately, I found the perfect dress. After trying on frilly dresses, leather dresses, silk dresses, cotton dresses, gowns, and lots more, I found a dress that totally represents me.
A PAINT SPLATTERED DRESS!!!
Then I decided to put on makeup. I started with foundation. Then I got some orange eyeshadow and then PACKED it on my right eyelid like a paint splotch. I then got lavender eyeshadow and packed it on my left eyelid also like a paint splotch. I added a small flick with liquid eyeliner on the corner of my eye almost like a cat eye but not quite on both eyes. Then I added mascara. Now for the cheeks! I added pink blush, and it looked more pretty than my eyes but I don’t mind. I absolutely love color and decided to show it on my face! For lipstick I got GOLD LIPSTICK and applied it. DONE AND BEAUTIFUL!
Today was a better day than yesterday. Yesterday I had no school because it was a weekend. But guess what? THERE WAS AN EARTHQUAKE.
When the earthquake happened, it was about 6:00 in the morning. My entire family was sleeping, and I of course felt it. I shot out of my bed and started running around the house saying that we were going to die. Unfortunately, all the neighbors heard me and ended up calling the police thinking it was a robbery in my house. My parents had to spend 3 hours trying to get everything straight with the police. I got grounded and was told it was only an earthquake. I spent the entire day in my room.
After remembering what happened the day before, I decided to let my stress go so I lit a tire on fire. Breathe in, breathe out. After the tire was all burnt down to ashes, I arrived here! Yayyyy.
So yeah! Do you guys have any stories on when you messed up like me but eventually got through it? Tell me in the comment section below!
Anyways, I guess that’s it for tonight! Oh and very sorry for not posting in about 2 or 3 Saturdays in a row! It was around the holidays and I was off visiting relatives for literally the entire day. I most likely won’t be posting this Saturday either because I need to go somewhere for the entire day. I’m very sorry, I try to post but I have literally NO TIME! *smacks forehead*
OWWW MY BRUISE…
So once again, thanks to Rukiya for letting me post and to all of you watching! Be sure to check out my blog, well if you want to, THE TALES OF ZOE, and I’ll see you all later!
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, AND BYE!
Hope you enjoyed it guys, but for now...